[erlang-questions] benchmarks game harsh criticism

Bengt Kleberg <>
Tue Dec 11 17:21:09 CET 2007


greetings,

it is good that you always think about the legalities involved in email 
discussions. not many people do. it would be better if you thought about 
how to communicate in email discussions, too.

some things that helps communication: what is the goal you have in mind 
when you send an email? if the receiver knows where the discussion is 
heading it will help. try to write clearly, not cleverly. if possible, 
be nice. avoid rhetorical questions that are thinly veiled threats. 
bullying people will make them shut up, but not change their mind. give 
a context to your questions. do not insinuate that your reader is an 
idiot. that either adds to the confusion or creates bad will. explain a 
lot since mind reading never works.

take your last email as an example. it probably says that you do not 
like a personal attack, only not directly. but what is it that you do 
not like? is it to be reminded of a mistake? or that your perfectly 
legal and very well crafted writing is called brutal?  i do not know and 
if you want me to know, then communication could fix that.

if you do not want me to know, then the simplest way is to avoid writing 
anything at all.


bengt

Those were the days...
    EPO guidelines 1978: "If the contribution to the known art resides
    solely in a computer program then the subject matter is not
    patentable in whatever manner it may be presented in the claims."


On 12/07/07 19:08, Isaac Gouy wrote:
> Please consider whether making a personal attack is an appropriate use
> of this mailing list or of your employers email service.
> 
> I provided a link to the benchmarks game public discussion forum -
> please understand that personal attacks will not be welcomed there.
> 
> There's nothing more for me to say.
> 
> 
> --- Bengt Kleberg <> wrote:
> 
>> greetings,
>>
>> as for losing audience i hope that my suggestion at the start of this
>>
>> discussion (''do not read this'') was followed by as many as
>> possible. 
>> having experienced isaac some 2-3 years ago (that time was much worse
>>
>> since i was unprepared) i expected something like this and thus
>> offered 
>> the warning.
>>
>>
>> taking this from the mail list is a good idea in theory.
>>
>> it was my first reaction when things turned ugly all those years ago.
>>
>> unfortunately isaac took the private email i sent him, chopped it
>> into 
>> little pieces, removing things like explanations, smilies, etc. he
>> then 
>> posted these pieces as straw man arguments on the mail list. using
>> his 
>> normal acerbic tone, he proceeded smashing them to dust.
>>
>> i sent another private email explaining that he had hurt me, asking
>> him 
>> to stop doing such things, and giving me an apology. his (private) 
>> answer was much more brutal than his mail list postings, the point
>> being 
>> that his act was not illegal and he would never apologise. finally he
>>
>> wrote that we should never send private email to each other again.
>>
>> so in practice i am not taking this off-line even though it would be
>> a 
>> nice thing for this list.
>>
>>
>> bengt
> 
> 
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